The 2009 ASSHOLE AWARDS!!!
Sunday, January 3, 2010 at 6:07AM The 2009 ASSHOLE AWARDS!!!
Hey everybody it's everyone's favorite asshole bringing you the last blog of 2009! I'm so happy this year has come to an end. While I'm on the subject of asshole I'm sitting here at a diner in downtown SD (San Diego) on New Year's Eve utilizing the free wifi but pissed at the waiter who can't get my fucking order right. In classic Mickey Skillz "asshole" swag.... I will continue to order food off the menu. (lots of it!) Enjoy it. Devour it. And leave. WITHOUT paying the bill. I don't pay for crap service or the food that comes along with it. I deal with enough crap listening to the latest homohop music or going to go see Rhianna LIVE! (Hey the dude I was fuckin' wit is a big fan so I had to go in order to get sum ass and later never call him again. Sorry Melvin.) So it is my honor to give out awards for the 1st ever ASSHOLE Awards. 2009 was a crazy and interesting year for homohop and this is just a recap of it.
The TRUTH AWARD goes to the cat that I believed brought realness to the game and always served the TRUTH. > BONE INTELL
Runner up Benni E.
Take 'yo ass to rehab award is deserving of the artist that is talented (some cases semi-talented) but just can't kick the habit or even admit to having a habit. > TWIZZA
(Runner-up Methjazell)
Damn Bitch!! You can spit award goes to the MC that showed lyrical stamina that would make KRS and Twista blush. > Benni E.
Close runner up Mack Mistress and Qpid (a WHOLE different kind of spit)
Wack rapper of the year award goes to the one artist that has time after time gave the public one wack project after another only to be met with a # FAIL!!!! >QPID (The only mic this kid needs to be near is a dick. Preferably a big one because I hear he is a power bottom with no walls.)
Close Runner-ups> Pam Jonez, Psycho Sexy and J.R. the queen of all CRAP music
Sexiest dude in HOMOHOP award goes to the artist that has overall sex appeal and provides me with constant wet dreams of me hittin' it from behind RAW. > BRY'NT
Close Runner ups> Drew Mason and Last offence
The illest mixtape of the year award goes to the artist that had unbelievable beats, flows, collabs and content throughout the whole cd. >NOT 4 NONPROFIT BY LAST OFFENCE
Close runner-ups> Cali's Don Cheetah by Prince Cateyez and Raising above the negatives by Granthm
STEP YO MUTHAFUCKIN' PEN GAME UP CUZ YO SHIT IS GARBAGE award goes to the rapper who may have hot beats and flows(even if they are stolen) but the pen game is on E!!! > PAM JONES (Please for 2010 no more jacked lil' kim verses.)
Close runnerups> Methjazell and Lester Greene
Pinkslip award because your services are no longer needed goes to an artist that may have had an equal opportunity a year ago but with all the newbies on the scene with fresh and better talent. (not to mention production.) Your position in homohop is terminated INDEFINITLY!!
Duo award goes to both YUNG ESO & THE ORIGINAL
Close runnerups> Mr. Teary and Twizza
I'm bout to shut it down in this BITCH!!(Rookie award) goes to an artist that shows promise and possibly a threat to less skill rappers in the game >MEDINO GREEN
Close runner up> Anye Elite
Go sit your ass down cause you are a HOT SIZZLIN' MESS award goes to the artist or person that you wish would just banish from the homohop scene for eternity.> Psycho Ugly...I mean Psycho Sexy
Close runner up > Khalil Amani
Well as 2009 comes to an end I can't help but think of all the weird, great & crazy shit that happen this year. Homohop still has a looooooooong way to go before being takin' seriously by the mainstream. 2009 saw the debut of new rappers like Drew Mason, Mack Mistress, Anye Elite, Ms. Jonz, Medino Green, Lola Mazarati and Benni E. 2009 also had sum of the biggest FAILs as well.......Pretty thugz, The Original, Bry'nt's Pornstar 2, Qpid, Alize Jenkins's grill, outmusicinsider.com and Twizza passing out on a radio show titled "The Evolution of Twizza".(He needs to evolve from being a drunk/drug addict to an artist that we can all take seriously) 2009 also had the BIGGest artists that stepped on the scene in a BIG way....Mr. Teary. Infinite, Swanny Rivers. Of course we can't forget the scandals that brought attention to the genre for better or worse..... Pam Jones getting butt fucked by 18 niggas and claimin' it wasn't sumthin she enjoyed. (Look up her song "Out of control)....Methjazell bragging on the radio about how she put it back thurr for Chingy (TMI!!!!).....Alize Jenkins putting Big Nugg on Blast for his lack of support of urban out hiphop artists on his now FAILED website......Twizza becoming Atlanta’s mascot for Coca Cola (sniff. sniff. I bet he had a white Christmas this year.)LOL.......Khalil Amani exposin' Last Offence for smellin like str8up ass and Miss Bry'nt for being a diva @ the legendary Shade 45 showdown.......Q.B. of the HotMess getting arrested for gun charges.....Feloni for threatenin' to sue Gayhiphop because she all of sudden wants to turn the knob to OFF on her lesbianism. LOL. (Check her song "Pussi can") Yes they kept us talking, laughin', thinking and even sayin' "Damn what a dumbass!" Hopefully 2010 will have less of this and more good homohop music. Later, I'm bout to close my Dell laptop and dash out the door before that waiter comes back and wonders why I still haven't made any attempts to pay this bill despite me finishing my meal 45 minutes ago. Until next month I'm out for 2009!!!!
Reader Comments (8)
Lol. I love that you stay true to your hustle of being an asshole. I couldn't have sad more or less! Happy New Year!
Thanks for the shout Asshole.
And yes OMI is a FAIL...and that s cool. Im done giving people exposure when they dont do shit to earn it. That is why OMI is no more. Besides I can just let OHH post all the BS for the scene.
Thanks Mickey!
peace nugg
Ms. Jonz is not a new rapper.. She's been in the game for a minute and has always had fresh flows. The first show I did with her was at Peace Out East in either 2004 or 2005.
Another correction! Last Offence was the DIVA at Shade 45 not Bry'NT! I guess I should've made that more clearer in my blog.
ps. you should've included yourself in the "Step yo muthafuckin Pen Game up" son.
Mickey wrote..."Go sit your ass down cause you are a HOT SIZZLIN' MESS award goes to" close runner up Khalil Amani. Lol!
How ironic is it that I was a part of "Biggest Accomplishment in Out hip-hop 2009," (Kayslay show), "Best Out Hip-hop Live Performance" (Street Cred--see me in the video?) and quoted in the "Not too distant 2nd" (being quoted in Spin Magazine?
Stick yo' self Mickey! The old man is a loooong way from sittin down somewhere! lol!
PS. The award for the "Spook Who Sat By The Door"/The Heard but NEVER Seen Award" goes to Miiiiiiiiickey Skiiiiilllllz! (In my best Michael Buffer/let's get ready to rumble voice)
watch what I do for the Movement in 2010! lol!
I'm sorry Khalil I forgot to give you your 2009 Asshole award. (envelope please!) This award goes to the person that has done sooooooooo much for the movement even though he's dissed half of the people that he helped along the way. This award is deserving of the one person that likes to remind us in every one his long winded blogs or rants of how important he is to the movement and how many dicks he has sucked on the low to get ...I mean how much "HARD" work he has done for the movement and how many Bullshit books he's written in his past. I proudly present the 2009 KISS MY 77 YEAR OLD BLACK ASS AWARD to Khalil Amani
Thank you! Now I can sleep at night! lol!
Why was Lester Greene only runner up on Yo shit is garbage